Current Status

Say a Prayer

We experience many things in life.. some, leave a memory etched so deep within us that nothing could ever erase it. A memory so clear, you never really forget how you felt at that very moment, no matter how much time elapses. You can still feel that piece of your heart breaking, that tug at your soul, that salty bitter tear hidden at the corner of your eye.

One of the worst feelings in the world is seeing a loved one extremely ill, or on a hospital bed in pain. Worst yet, is when that loved one is either someone really young or really old. It makes you feel so helpless. You want to help, you want to make them feel better, you want to take your health and give it to them. Yet, the only thing within your power is a prayer.

May God bless our loved ones, watch over them, give them the strength to get over any weakness or illness, and keep them strong enough for us to hug them, love them, and cherish every moment with them.

I owe it to YOU

i find my mind drifting.. i can't stop thinking about you. everything you taught me.. everything you still teach me. i yearn to learn more. there's just so much. ur life.. ur experiences.. the way you handle obstacles.. the way you treat those around u.. ur enemies before ur friends even. simply amazing!

ur kindness is unnatural! you've given me yourself, truly and completely. the things u've put up with, for my sake... it just fascinates me! the love i feel towards you, is immeasurable. the respect i have for u, i hold for no other.

any time i face any difficulty, i think of u and how u would handle it.. i remember how u've handled the many problems u've faced in life.. problems, a million times more severe than what i go through. yet, u managed to handle them with humility, with forgiveness, with great wisdom.

you are truly my role model. who else can compare to u? who else can ever stand anywhere close to you? you have taught me how to live.. how to smile.. how to thank God for what i have, and be happy when God pushes troubles in my path. you've given me strength to endure. you've given me light to help me see the way.

my world would be nothing had it not been for ur teachings. i wonder what it would have been like had i actually lived to know u. those who have never witnessed ur days, are still touched by you. to know u, is to love you. to love you, is to understand what you stood for. to understand u, is to know that there's no way to be, but your way.

Allahuma 9allee wa sallim 3ala Sayedna wa 7abebona Mohammed, wa 3ala 2al Mohammed, wa 3ala 9a7behi wa Ahlehi ajma3een...

Just Breathe

So the wedding, all the preparations, all the hoo-ha, is finally over! Amazing how something that occupied so much of our time is now nothing but a memory! Just another reminder of how we really put too much importance on things that will eventually just evaporate anyway!

That said, it's time for me to whine again. I sooo need a vacation! Every time I plan to take one, something happens and I'm still sitting here. So until then, I hereby declare my brain on official hiatus - until further notice.

Forever

You sit alone in a dark room, yet you hear my voice ringing in your ears. You turn on the tv and turn up the volume real high, yet your mind drifts and you remember words I said. Conversations we've had start running through your head. You go to sleep.. yet you dream of me.

You keep running, but you can't seem to get away. You can't escape me because you know what I mean to you. You can't get rid of me because you know that I am good for you. No matter how many times you curse me, how many times you try to get over me, I'm still here.

Why are you so mad at me? Why are you so annoyed by me? All I've done is support you and try to help you see what's right for you.

There was a time when you used to like listening to me.. when you felt challenged by me.. when you analyzed every word I said to you.

Do you remember those days? What happened to change all of that? You think I care? I only cared for you. You think I'll be upset? I was only upset for you. You think I'll go away? You can never get rid of me, no matter how hard you try.. not because I won't go away, but because one day, you'll realize, I was always a part of you.

Always,
your conscience

Feel Good

Since I whined in my last post, I thought I'd go in the opposite direction now.

Want to know what one of the best feelings for me right now is?? Completely dark room.. the soft buzz of the air conditioner in the background.. cold room... tired eyes... laying down in the comfy bed, head sunk deep on the soft pillow... comforter pulled up tight around me.... eye lids getting heavier.. and heavier... until i fall off into deep sleep. Those last few moments as you float into the land of dreams are absolute bliss!!

*™ T.P.

Tag.. You're IT!

I've been busy the past few weeks with preparations for a family wedding. Here are a couple questions for you though:

* Why is it that we always seem to take the 'wrong' traits/habits from the West??

In the past, someone gets married, you buy them a wedding gift when they move into their new home. End of story.

NOW, there's a bridal shower, embarak, baby shower, not forgetting all the money that gets spent on clothes, make up, hair, accessories for the engagement AND wedding party! PEOPLE, please... you want to get married, enjoy.. congratulations.. but spare us the empty wallets in the process! :)

Instead, how come people don't pick up "punctuality" from the West?!? Last night we had a gathering for the bride; people showed up THREE HOURS LATE!

* Why is it that people feel compelled to tell you 'el fal lech' (hope ur next!)??

What if I don't want to be next? What if I'm completely at peace with my singlehood and am not interested in moving to the "State of Matrimony"? And the sad thing, if I dare say anything to the effect of 'not interested', or the look on my faces gives it away, I get a LOOONG lecture about how 'YOU MUST!'

ok... so tag, I'm it!

Do You Have The Time?

How come there never seems to be enough 'time'?

When I was a student, I thought I didn't have enough time to get things done. When I started work I thought 'Man, I had it easy when I was in school! I had so much free time!'. When I started working AND studying at the same time, I thought 'I was such a baby back then!! If I can find time for both, that means I had so much free time before when I just had to deal with ONE!'

Now that I'm back to just working, I still don't have time!

The cycle continues while the excuses get more creative. There always seems to be a reason that's keeping us (me!) busy. My question is, why can't I find time?? Where is it hiding?!

مأجورين

I want THAT!

You know how sometimes you see something and think *i wish i had that*, thinking that *that* is better than your *this*?

Keep in mind that a lot of times, that's not the case. It's merely you getting BORED of what you have and so, something new SEEMS more appealing. However, it's not necessarily better.. and that, you'll eventually notice, when you've gotten bored with the *this*!!